Jeter Drops pop-up, Blames Fan

Fenway Park, Boston.
A routine infield pop-up in Wednesday night's Red Sox-Yankees game turned anything but routine as perennial All-Star Derek Jeter camped under the ball.
"I was right under it, I was sure I had it," said Jeter afterward. "But that guy in section 448, upper deck, right field corner...he yelled 'Miss it!' and it totally shook me."
It's common practice at ballparks nationwide for fans to try razzing on opposing fielders in hopes that they misplay the ball, but now we have an answer for if it actually works.
When questioned on the subject, Yankee center fielder Johnny Damon responded "Oh hell yeah! I'd say 95% of the balls I miss are because fans shout out for it when I'm about ready to catch it." He then added, "some skeptical fans claim that it doesn't work, but trust me, it does."
The miscue couldn't have come at a worse time for the Yankees; the bases were loaded for the Sox, who were threatening to break the game open.
Making matters worse for the Bombers was the batter - David Ortiz. Ortiz has been in an extended slump for the course of the season, but perhaps no more.
"It wasn't so much the hit that pulled me out of it, it was actually the guy sitting next to the one who psyched out Jeter...as the pitch was coming in he muttered 'please hit the ball,' so that's what I went for," said the slugger in a postgame interview.
Jeter was also thrown off on every other ball hit to him under similar circumstances. "Yeah, someone seemed to say something every time the ball came to me. And the guy yelling 'whiff' every time I swung the bat definitely contributed to my three strikeouts on 9 pitches."
When asked about his 0-3, 3 strikeout hitting performance, Alex Rodriguez responded "Me? No, I didn't hear anyone say anything, I just accidentally changed my calendar to October."

Suck it, Yankees fans.

Stupid iPod

Hey fellas: Been here?

I went to work out a few days ago. Of course I had my iPod (except mine is called the Kevin NyePod) strapped to my lower bicep. It was in such a position that you could see it at the end of the sleeve of my shirt.
I tend to not use the "Hold" button on the Kevin NyePod because I like to leave it on shuffle and this affords me the ability to skip over tracks and change the volume, yada yada yada.
Sometimes I get into a groove and hit a string of songs that mesh together well and thus I don't skip around - makes sense. I like to listen to upbeat music while I'm working out and try to avoid slow songs.
I was sitting down on a bench between sets and just sort of zoning out and looking around. I glanced around and tried to see if I could decipher what album covers I could see on other folks' iPods. Now obviously, I should have been able to see them on everyone's because it's been proven that every college student who owns an iPod downloads exclusively from iTunes and pays the standard price to legally obtain digital music. [citation needed]
However, as I looked around I didn't see much so I went back to my workout.
I was facing hte mirror at this point, sitting down to do a shoulder press and on my second repetition I noticed something: I could see in the mirror that the NyePod was glowing.
Without the "Hold" button on, the pod had taken action and woken up due to the motion of my workout. The backlight went on, the album cover popped up, and it occurred to me what I was listening to...

"7 Things I Hate About You."

I was 2 reps in; now I had to decide whether or not I should put the weight down and finish the set or just ignore it and act like I'm owning my embarassing moment.
Really, it didn't matter what I did...and it won't matter what you do if this happens to you.
Either way, you're a loser.

If you're wondering why I was listening to that song or how it got on the NyePod, you've obviously never heard the song.

This Could Get Weird

OK, fair warning. I'm writing this from bed at about 2:20 A.M.
One may think that this would be my preemptive apology for any misspellings or anything like that, but that's not why I added that disclaimer. The disclaimer is because there's a good chance I go crazy at some point during this post.
I'm really pretty sure I'm moving along that slippery slope.
There comes a point most nights where I give up on thinking clearly and try to just confuse myself to sleep, but that doesn't work.
I've been sleeping poorly for a solid year now, and I know I'm not the only one, so I'm not going to try making that claim. Almost every night I wake up once before 5 A.M. and it's usually before 4...so maybe I'll skip out on that tonight since it's so soon.
I have the habit of thinking about every single thing that bothers me in my life while I'm trying to relax and fall asleep. I know that's not helpful, but I can't help it. It's what I do.
Tonight's not really an exception. I'm not really sure what I'm tense about, but I am, and it blows.
Making matters worse is that I was incredibly tired for the majority of the day...until I committed to trying to sleep. Since that moment I've woken up more and more by the minute.
And I'm convinced that I'm about to snap.
I want to get up and lower my shoulder in a dead-sprint through my bedroom door.
I want to light a stuffed animal on fire and wonder through the flames about whether or not that makes me a damaged person.
I want to stand up and flex every muscle in my body, utter a guttural, primal scream and slam a hole through my closet doors.
Or I want to get some fucking sleep.

And the consequences?
I know it makes me irritable, I start to get rude. I don't feel like putting up with people, but then I feel rejected if they don't put up with me. It's not fair to me or them.
My emotions are heightened when they should be dulled down for the night.
How long will I ramble?
Doesn't matter, writing won't put me to sleep. I can only hope it clears the mind a little bit.
I feel the edge starting to wear off. So I'm done for now.
The brain is a fickle thing.
It really makes you wonder sometimes.

Everything Sucks on this Programming Network

I've got to hand it to you ESPN, you've done it again.
The first time you lost me was when the Mitchell Report came out. Then it was when anyone went on trial. Then it was when anyone did anything stupid. Then it was the ultimate highlight tournament. Now it's Mount Rushmore. But somehow, it's also Alex Rodriguez too! I don't understand how you can literally show next to nothing on ESPN when you have about 6 networks. I remember when Dodgeball came out and everyone giggled at the idea of ESPN 8: the Ocho. But here we are with ESPN, ESPN 2, ESPN Classic, ESPNews, ESPNU, ESPN Plus, and ESPN on ABC (whatever the hell that means).
The most remarkable part is that if I were to turn on any of those channels today, I would hear about Alex Rodriguez taking steroids.
Wait a minute...there's a professional baseball player who took steroids in 2003 and won the MVP with outstanding numbers? What's that? 105 guys in the league tested positive that year? And there was no consequence to failing the test that year? So there's really nothing that can come of this other than blowing it out of proportion? He can't be reprimanded for this because IT WASN'T ILLEGAL AT THE TIME TO TEST POSITIVE FOR STEROIDS, SO WHO THE HELL CARES?
ESPN has managed to once again devote roughly 16 hours a day to a non-story. A guy who has gained 60 pounds of muscle in 10 years took steroids? He's a freaking body-builder at this point, and so is everyone else in the league. Furthermore, what ever happened to Sportscenter til 1, then obscure sports until about 4 or 5? Now Sportscenter goes until 3 P.M.! What the hell for? Especially because it gets followed up by a sport-specific highlight show!
So in conclusion, ESPN, I've fallen out of love with you. You used to make my day: every morning I'd get up and watch you for about three hours, making sure I knew the ins and outs of every highlight - because that's what made the show...highlights - and I loved it. Then you changed: now I have to sit through you talking to a correspondent from each major sport that's had a game played in the last 24 hours (Barry Melrose, Mel Kiper, Ed Werder, Buster Olney, and Tim Legler do not belong in the same hour of TV). You're not worth my time anymore, ESPN. You used to be cool...what happened?

It makes you wonder whose assholes ideas these were, doesn't it?

The truth

Here's what it comes down to. For the majority of my football-loving life, I've been a Cleveland Browns fan. The sad truth is that I don't even care anymore.
I used to get mad at people who I'd deem fair-weather fans because I couldn't accept people not giving their time to a crappy team and then reaping the benefits when the team finally does succeed. The days of that are over, and here's why.

I don't care about the Cleveland Browns right now. I know that's easy to say because it's the off-season, but the point remains the same. Look at the facts: they've made the playoffs once since their return in 1999, and the 10-6 fruitless season of 2007 proved to be other winning season since the re-inception of the team.

The Browns are a product. If there's one universal fact about the sporting world, it's that these teams - and leagues - are businesses. The product which the Cleveland Browns are putting out is, let's face it, a really shitty product. When you don't score a touchdown for a month and get shut out by one of the other perennial losers, your product is terrible. Let's not overlook the fact that this product comes complete with one hour of commercials in your three hours of television: especially because the Browns had a habit of going 3-and-out roughly 8 times a game so there was about a minute and a half of football between 3-minute commercial sets.
THAT IS A TERRIBLE PRODUCT.
One more glance at the comedy of errors that the Browns have become shows that Sports Illustrated's senior writer Peter King (who is a retard) picked Cleveland as his sleeper pick for this past NFL season: the corner of the front-page of the September 8th issue of SI read "Keep an eye on the Cleveland Browns, Here's why, by Peter King." A hopeful article followed; with details of how the Browns were hoping to move into the playoff-contender stage after being so close the previous season.
King forgot something: the team sucks.
They have sucked for quite some time.
They will continue to suck.
And if they don't continue to suck, you can bet your ass that I'll jump back into being a fan.
And if you even try to get mad at me for that, think of it from a business sense: I'm investing my worthy-time in other places until they show me they're not an organization full of ass-clowns.

Makes you wonder how they can inspire such ridiculous emotions.
PS, kudos to the Steelers. There's your proof that I don't care about the Browns right now, I'm congratulating the Steelers for being the best franchise in the NFL. They're f'ing incredible.

Re-introduction

To the world, I'm reintroducing this blog in an entirely new light. In the past I was all about pretending to blog about sports because I love sports, but I've found myself musing an awful lot lately...so why not write these things down?

For instance: different people have thought capacities at different levels - it's hard to disagree. Some people are simply gifted and have the ability to think at a higher level than others...however, the truly gifted are the ones who have the ability to fluctuate between levels of thought, aren't they?

The point here is that being smart isn't enough: the real gift is being able to communicate to those who think beneath you. It's not easy, in fact, it's most likely one of the most nerve-wracking things one can do, but the dirty little secret is that those who are not as smart as yourself still play pivotal roles in your life. Whether they are the person selling you a house, the person you work for, or the person who tucks you in at night, they're a part of your life which you can't ignore.

It doesn't do any good to resent people who don't have a gift for higher thought, so why is it so nearly impossible to think in such a way?

...makes you wonder.

God to Ohio; "You're right."

In an incredibly rare press conference Sunday night, the eve of the BCS National Championship, God told the Associated Press "I really don't like Ohio."
Ohioans have speculated for decades that the Almighty was not a fan, due to the cruelty with which He's treated the local sports teams - a point driven home by the fact that He was wearing an LSU hat, Florida Gators long-sleeve shirt, Red Sox t-shirt, San Antonio Spurs warm-ups, a Steelers Super Bowl ring, and Air Jordans, circa 1989.
"It's not just the sports," added God, "when the weather hits Monday, you're gonna be pissed." Shortly after these comments were made, the predicted temperatures in Ohio jumped into the upper 60s for January 7th.
Pissed off resident Dale Munson is one of many who are not thrilled with the recent developments. "I've been telling people for years that God hates us. He always makes our teams lose, He makes sure there's continual construction on the freeways, and anytime the mega millions winner is from Ohio, He makes sure it's a douche-bag."
The Omniscient one had a pre-emptive response for Dale; "Seriously...just move somewhere else and it'll be fine," and with a smile, added "it's like you guys don't get it, I really am out to get you."
The timing couldn't be worse for Ohio State fans, as the state has been unduly tortured lately - what with two Buckeyes national championship losses ("You wouldn't believe the thoughts I heard after those!" said God), plus the Cavaliers losing in the NBA Finals ("That one was mean, My bad."), and the Indians' painful collapse in the ALCS this past year ("You guys were convinced you had it...great television right there."). The soon-to-be-played BCS title game, featuring the Buckeyes and LSU Tigers could merely be another chance to torture Ohio. "I've definitely toyed with the idea of screwing them again...I guess you'll just have to wait and see, won't you?"
He then added "but seriously, I already know who's gonna win."

One Play

Coke and I were just talking about one of the most outstanding plays we've ever seen - Lebron's dunk over Rasheed Wallace. Now, my thoughts on Rasheed Wallace are not the topic of this article - if they were, someone would bound to be offended.
This article is about a question: Can one play change the outcome of a series?
Logic says no. I mean, really, one play? It was 2 points, granted it was late in the game, and yes it got the crowd fired up, but did that one drive to the basket (and the thunderous right handed flush that followed) really do enough to legitimately twist the fate of these two ball-clubs? It's time once again for a little bit of a comparison session:
The "no" argument:
Cleveland still trails 2-1 in the series. The Cavaliers were at home where they're much more likely to win. Detroit's back-court didn't show up to play (not including Billups' 2 gorgeous shots in the final 4 minutes). Cleveland had gotten a few calls going their way earlier in the game (Sheed's phantom blocking foul on Marshall - probably a foul, but not much of one, Sheed almost had the right to whine about that one). Games 5 and 7 (if necessary) will be back in Detroit where we've lost both games. They're still Detroit and they still have 1 of the top 5 players in the Eastern Conference at every position.

The "yes" argument:
Disclaimer: the series has a long way to go, so there's not a legitimate argument here, it's all speculation. Lebron single-handedly brought any Detroit momentum to a screeching halt and swung it immeasurably onto our side with that dunk. Without that dunk, who's to say he has the confidence and the ultimately killer-instinct to drain both of his threes and pop that beauty of a game-killer. Detroit now has the fear of Bron in them, which is 2nd only to the fear of god. They're officially completely focused on him, especially now that Hughes is out, thus giving the rest of the team tons of opportunities to rip it up. And yes, I feel that the sole reason that they're completely scared of him is because of that one dunk - or at least as a result of that possession.

So there you have it. Pros, Cons, the ins and outs.
Cavs take it in 7.

The Revival

When it comes to crunch time, I can't just sit back and not write about what's going on. That said, here's my analysis of things of late.

The Tribe is really good...seriously. Sabathia is enormous, and he's good at pitching, look for him as an AL Cy Young candidate with the seemingly perennial winner, Johan Santana.
Steve Nash is in my top 3 favorite players with Bron and Anderson Varejao. Except that, between you and me, Nash took a dive from Horry. Look at the size comparison between Nash and Horry; could Robert Horry ever knock Steve Nash down? I didn't think so. Exciting to see the Suns almost pull it out last night without those two guys; you know, Amare the overrated center who didn't deserve to be a first-team NBAer, and Boris the French guy with a decidedly Russian name (don't you remember Boris and Natasha from Rocky and Bullwinkle?).
As for the Cavaliers...their game 5 offensive set reminded me of a fish out of water except for the fact that dying fish flop around and move at least a little bit whereas the Cavs just stood around all night not doing much. The Cavs torched the Nets to the tune of a blistering hot 33% shooting night with only one player shooting over 50%, and that was Z going 6-8. Meanwhile, the Nets managed to go 1-15 from the field in the 4th quarter and we went ahead and decided not to make shots and come back. Infuriating, to say the least. The swagger needs to return a bit for game 6, but I'm still confident that we can take 1 of games 5, 6, and 7, and one's all you need. Meanwhile, best wishes to Lebron's baby's momma who is 8 months pregnant and needed to be hospitalized during game 5 - reportedly side-trackign Bron from the business at hand.
But I'm sick of talking about that disaster last night.
And my laptop battery is dying, so I can't really type a whole lot more.
We're pushing 3 weeks since the NFL draft and not a single Cleveland Browns player has suffered a potentially career-ending injury - let alone a season-ending one. So far, so good.
Nye.o.lator. out.

Tribe

I am only writing this as a memo that the Cleveland Indians took over first place in the Central Division on April 15...I assume that tomorrow - since the Tribe has the day off - someone will again tie them for first, but I plan on us never looking back from this point forward.
good day.

selfless promotion

of myself.
Coke and a few others have been so kind as to produce the first and only pirate newspaper: for pirates, by pirates, at http://30lashes.blogspot.com I'm a contributor for obvious reasons.
you should check this out, it's pretty awesome.

until next time I get a good idea,
adieu.

Philosophy of humor

I'm discussing humor with a couple people right now, and it's getting me thinking about life in general.
I like to think that without humor, we have nothing. Humor is the essence of life as we know it. What are we doing with our lives? Well, hopefully, we're being entertained by some form of humor.
If we don't have humor, what exactly do we have?
If we can't hear the sound of laughter, if we cant smile at something funny, if we can't smile because someone else is smiling at something funny, what the hell are we doing?
With this in mind, I'm dedicating my life to making people laugh. I've got about 4 minutes of stand-up material written (done in the last 24 hours) and I've got several ideas that need to be pared down.
To help prove this point, I'm going to be carrying out a lie in the near future that only a handful of people know about...and the whole point of this lie is because it's funny. If it doesn't harm anyone, and I (along with a few in the know) think it's funny, then how bad can it be, right?
I guess the point of all this is that I feel like laughter is the essence of life, and it's among my goals to simply make people laugh as often as I can.
That's my new goal in life...make people laugh.

Strange

The past...iduno...2 weeks I've been pulling off the most consistently stupid thing a person can possibly do.
I've been actively putting off sleep to waste time being awake.
Why do we do this? Why would we avoid what's natural, logical, and altogether smart to do something completely useless? Why is it that I have made a habit out of talking to Ryan Beatty at roughly 2 a.m. because we're both too stupid to go to bed? Are your fingers the last part of your body to fall asleep? I mean, I'll sit here, my head is tilted so far off to the side that I can barely tell what I'm typing, eyes blurry, thinking about how tired I am...talking about how tired I am...and then I'll just go ahead and start youtubing videos of free running or america's funniest home videos or even less important crap. This, of course, in between ridiculous conversation with whoever is online. Take, for instance, the following conversation with beatty last night:

laskdkjfm: you ever start to think...sometimes when you are talkin to people online they are working themselves out
nyebergod: weird concept
nyebergod: cuz i've done it
nyebergod: i mean, not while talking to you
nyebergod: but i've been spankin one out and held a semi-conversation online
laskdkjfm: ye ive done it before
laskdkjfm: really bad convos
laskdkjfm: all one word answers
nyebergod: yeah, they're terrible
nyebergod: imagine getting busted via internet
laskdkjfm: haha
nyebergod: like, not really answering someone and having them be like "...are you jerkin off or somethin?"
laskdkjfm: hahahaha
nyebergod: i mean...i'd probably admit it, just cuz of how outrageous that'd be
laskdkjfm: ye it would
laskdkjfm: "actually im jackin off to lesbian midgets dressed at little aliens"
laskdkjfm: haha
nyebergod: haha
laskdkjfm: not like ive done that
nyebergod: definitely not
nyebergod: i havnet bookmarked "www.lesbianmidgetaliens.com"

We seriously had that conversation at 2:15 a.m. last night. And what's worse, is that it carried on for another half an hour or something so i didnt even end up going to bed til like 3. Why?
because I'm completely retarded.
Oh, by the way - it's standard practice for every conversation with anyone, ever, to include the phrase "...niccce." If you haven't seen this south park episode/clip, go here, now: http://youtube.com/watch?v=CkeCGwycsh8
if you didn't click that link, our friendship is over.

Ramble

I have nothing on the top of my head about what to write, I just feel like I should write something.
I'm pretty pissed off that Fox Sports never wrote me back after my angry letter to those bums. Obviously, since I'm home in snowy Chesterland, it's not an issue about seeing the Cavaliers play.
Speaking of snow, we got hit with about 6 inches of the fluffy white stuff last night...I haven't seen this much powder since I hung out with Whitney Houston and Bobby Brown. Ba-zing!
Brown? like the Cleveland Browns? the team who actually won a game Sunday? Man...I did not see that comin. We actually looked like a football team - who knew? This might seal the deal that I was wrong about my bet that we'd lose more players for the season than wins we'd have in the season; at 4-8 with 3 starters out, I think I just lost. Needless to say, I don't mind.
I might just start freestylin for kicks. Like when I'm out Christmas shopping I'm gonna record a beat on my phone then just walk up to people, press play and like "yo...bitch...yo....yo...I'm Christmas shoppin and poppin while you stoppin and watchin as I break your will with my looks that kill. You buyin presents for your moms as I chill and drop bombs about buyin some hoodies and fillin stocking with goodies for your little brother...by the way - I forgot to thank your mother." and then I'd have someone with to go start jumpin up and down goin "OHHHHH SHIT...THAT'S HOT!" and stuff like that.
Yeah...Kevin Nye, the Christmas freestyler. Comin to a mall near you, Christmas season '06*.

That's all I got right now, Cavaliers need to crack down. Brownies actually won. Tribe made some ridiculous signing of some guy with an Italian name...we all know how good Italians are at baseball. Seriously - name one Italian born MLB player, I dare you.
ok I'm done.
* the mall near you, assuming that you're near the Great Lakes Mall in Mentor, Ohio.

COLLEGE FREAKING BASKETBALL

I love college basketball.
I could end the post right there, because from this point I'm just gonna ramble on that topic.
I'm gonna ramble like Seth McFarlane when he runs out of ideas.

Anyway, I watched the majority of the UNC/OSU game tonight, and it has led me to believe that UNC has "it." There are routine studies to find out what exactly "it" is, but I'm pretty sure that UNC has whatever that thing happens to be. Having said that, OSU's good too - Greg Oden should be interesting to see in action. There's a lot of factors - as proven by things like Amare Stoudemire coming back into the Suns' lineup last year, you don't just come back and instantly help the team out and be a star player...there's chemistry issues, there's physical issues, etc. However, that guy's huge - and according to your mother, size matters.

In other college basketball news, I believe I have a sweet 16 to pick....so without further ado, I bring you Kevin Nye's end-of-November Sweet 16 projections:
1. North Carolina - Hansbrough and co. have enough to get them into the 3rd ring of the tourney...however, might not have the size to make it to the finals.
2. Georgetown - Hibbert owns the inside, case closed.
3. OSU - yeah...don't really know what else to say.
4. Florida - This is a no-brainer. All 5 returning from the defending champs.
5. Kansas - Just pulled off a wild win vs. Florida a few days ago, proving that they've got the talent. However, Kansas always loses early, so keep an eye on that one.
6. Nevada - Nick Fazekas is too good to be stopped before the sweet 16...he's about to win his 3rd straight conference player of the year.
7. Arizona - Lute Olsen's got a hell of a crew in there, Chase Budinger is 6'7 with a 42" vertical...that's sick (he was also national high school volleyball player of the year...imagine his intramural team, eh? oh yeah, and he averaged 34 points and 11 boards a game in high shcool...nasty).
8. UConn - Jim Calhoun gets it done with zero returning starters.
9. Texas - This is actually a surprise pick since Texas is also returning zero starters. But Kevin Durant will win big 12 player of the year - write that down...oh...I guess I already did. nevermind.
10. UCLA - I'm not entirely sold on them, but they did make the final 4 last year, and I don't know much about the PAC-10, but they get the nod here.
11. LSU/Alabama - I know, I'm cheating by picking 2 teams...but it's only because I'm not sold on either of these teams...but they're very highly rated, and Alabama's returning 4 starters...building on last year's 2nd round exit...LSU obviously had the final 4. But still, I think Big Baby is too trimmed down and he'll get eaten up inside...and they'll just not be that good.
12. Wichita State - can't exclude the Shockers for 2 reasons; 1 is that they beat tennessee as a 15 seed last year and are coming back with 4 out of their 5, and 2 is that their freaking name is the shockers.
13. Syrause - No McNamara, no problem, I say. Their other 4 are back and they have a sick frosh...and that pesky 2-3 they run is damn near perfect when Jim Boeheim gets a hold of them.
14. Southern Illinois - Salukis reppin' the MVC....biatch.
15. San Diego State - Aztec love mothafuckaz. Got the probably mountain west winners in here.
16. Gonzaga - Chuck helped this pick. I hated Morrison, but I like Raivio, Josh Heytvelt is pretty solid in the post, and Altidor-Cespedes was the sneaky stud on that team last year...so what the hell, Prueter gets the call.

That's it brothers and sisters. Those are my sweet 16 picks.
Obviously, since I can only pick about 11 out of 16 correctly when I have the list of the 32 available teams in front of me, I don't expect to get more than about 8 of these correct. Oh well, such is life. I figure 8 right is about as good as 8 wrong.
I'm talkin more nonsense than a Vietnamese prostitute on a military camp, I gotta stop.
Come on Cavs...let's get it back together.
Browns? you're almost dead to me...but like a dead family member, I still love ya.
sigh.

My letter to FSN

I hate it when seemingly intelligent television stations do stupid things. Last year at that little school east of here I wrote a scathing letter to comcast cable after they managed to show the same bengals/steelers game on both of their cbs channels. Profane, angry, yet structured. Ultimately I got a response that basically said they'd be forced to put my opinions in the trash folder. ...seems pretty stupid to me, considering an angry opinion means a lot more than a rational, calm opinion...if you ask me that is. Anyway, I decided to take a hint from those retards and send a letter along to FSN Ohio discussing how they've shown the Blue Jackets instead of the Cavaliers each of the last two times they've each played simultaneously.
So, here it is.


I'm a student at Ohio University, hailing from the Cleveland area, and I'm appalled at the fact that twice in a row, FSN Ohio has showed the Columbus Blue Jacket hockey game instead of the Cleveland Cavaliers basketball game. I realize that we're geographically closer to Columbus than Cleveland, but here is a list of reasons that this scheduling :
1. The Blue Jackets have the worst record in their division.
2. The Cavaliers have the best record in their conference.
3. LeBron James is the most marketable athlete in the world today - providing the Cavaliers with one of the largest fan-bases in the NBA.
4. The NHL locked out for an entire season and came back - yet no one seemed to notice; the NHL is the least-watched professional sport short of the WNBA.
5. I have never met anyone who can name more than 1 player on the Columbus Blue Jackets.
6. I don't know anyone who can't name 1 player on the Cleveland Cavaliers (this is clearly related to #3).

The bottom line is that it's preposterous to put any NHL game (the Stanley Cup last year drew worse ratings than regular season MLB games...which is embarassing) on instead of any NBA game - especially when said NBA game features 2 of the league's best players in LeBron James and Kevin Garnett.
In closing, I understand that FSN Ohio is contracted to show games featuring both of these teams; I just find it ridiculous to think that the last two times they played simultaneously, the Blue Jackets were deemed more important.
I expect changes.


There you have it. I expect changes, and a response.
Based on the response I get, I might not only post the response, but then counter-argue and unleash the proverbial beast on them. I'm pumped.

Basketball season.

I'm so pumped that basketball's back. This is the best time of the year. I love this. When do I ever seem this excited about a post? During basketball season, that's when.
Everything is good about this. I'm watching some NIT regional finals - gonzaga vs. baylor. I must say, I like the zags a lot more now that Morrison's gone - I can't stand him. They got Raivio back, and they have Pierre Altidor-Cespedes...whose nickname is in the works. Baylor's getting killed, but I will continue to watch because it's college basketball! yes! Saw a bit of the UNC game earlier, good times. I was shocked to see that Tyler Hansbrough's career high in rebounds was only 11. I know he's only been in for a year and a couple games...but he's a power forward/center who pretty much out-athletes everyone....Iduno, it was just surprising.
Speaking of surprising...Kansas already started choking! Awesome! I pick them every year and they already blew it! Oral Roberts wins by a convincing 7 point margin. Kansas came in ranked #3, I don't know who they were kidding. I'm looking forward to them once again choking their way into the toughest region at a 3 or 4 seed and eeking through the first round...maybe 2 rounds, and then getting beaten by double digits. Mark it down, you can set your calendar by it. Nothing marks the tail end of March like a Kansas choke. I love college basketball.
The Cavaliers are good. Larry Hughes left the game with a bruised leg, that's no fun, but at least it's just a bruise. I'm not even writing about interesting stuff here, I don't know what's going on.
I'm really tired...and I have a lot of studying to do - 1 final down, 3 to go. I shouldn't have stayed up til 5 plotting pranks last night. Stupid college kids.
...just a thought...as I'm watching ESPN during halftime...is this Karl Ravech? I haven't seen his face yet, but is Karl Ravech really pulling off college basketball analysis? This is something that needs to be examined.
I'm going to bed.
Go Cavs, Browns, and Tribe!

Million dollar question.

So last night I was pretending to study and talking to Ski when we discussed a very interesting question.
I mentioned to him that Britney Spears had filed for divorce from that stud Kevin Federline. Obviously, one day later, this basically becomes old news. However, the question stands:
Would you still have sex with Britney Spears?
Let's take a deeper look at the pros and cons.
Pros: She's still Britney Spears; you fantasized about her endlessly from about 8 years ago to about 3 years ago and rightfully so - she was gorgeous. She had everything going for her that a girl could have; a pretty good voice, great looks, lots of money, and Justin Timberlake at her side (and really, no one would have been mad if they had stuck together). Plain and simple, Britney Spears was the balls. Furthermore, now that she's split from that trash-pile, she will most likely get back into the spotlight and clean herself up. Granted she's got kids now, but Pamela Anderson and Heidi Klum have quite easily proven that hollywood moms stay hotter than hell if they so desire. Also, let's not rule out another album within the next year or so - taking a heart-break (if you can call it that) and turning it into a successful album is anything but strange in the music biz (see: Tragic Kingdom from No Doubt)...and clearly, in order to have a new album out, she'll have to get hot again.
now.
Cons: Kevin Federline had sex with her.
There are more cons than that...but seriously, that one trumps anything else you can ever come up with. That's worse than her new-found passion for cigarettes and ugly guys.
Worse than her disappearance from the lime-light to live in something resembling a mobile home.
Worse than her 55 hour marriage to a child-hood friend.
Worse than her tattoo-history: her first tattoo was of Chinese characters on her leg which she thought read "mysterious" but actually read "strange." and her 2nd tattoo is a Kabbalah/Hebrew tattoo on the back of her neck - which she has tried twice...the first one was gibberish, this one is one of the 70ish Kabbalah words for "god."
Seriously though, K-Fed trumps all that...and it hurts.

So there you have it; the pros and cons laid out for you to make your own decision - I expect comments.

P.S. I'd wait 6 months during her mourning period, then rock her world.

Inspiration

You loyal readers may recall that I made a motivational post preaching the point that if you quit when you're tired, you'll never get any better.
That's still true.
But I'm here today to talk on a different - but related - subject.
It's time for a little story about why I am the way I am.

As you probably know, I'm not exactly the type of guy who does something because other people do it. It's not that I'm an attention-whore and trying to get people to notice me because I'm different...it's not that I have a vendetta against people who do things that I don't do...it's none of that.
Basically, the reason that I am how I am - that being why I don't drink, don't smoke, don't do stuff that people tell me to do just because they do it - is because of a simple lesson that I managed to conjure up from my own life's experience.
It comes down to the fact that someone's always watching.
See, people ask me all the time why I don't drink, and I always have different answers: I've made up stories, I've exaggerated truths, I've tried simple reasoning, I've done it all...but the best way I can explain it is that someone is always watching.
In case you didn't know, I've got myself 2 older brothers who totally kick ass. The whole time they were growing up, I was right behind them by 5ish years - watching everything they did...desperately wishing I was their age and got to drive and do cool stuff whenever I wanted. Basically, my brothers and their friends were my heroes - and I always noticed that they were really good role models (hard not to notice when you are practically stalking them). I started to think about why that could have been, and thought that maybe it had something to do with me. I don't want to make any bold statements like this, but I took that and formed my own opinion.
During high school, you quite obviously will start to experience some new things and get into new types of situations...and every time I was faced with one of these decisions, I'd always do what I thought would be the right thing because deep down I knew that someone was watching. Somewhere out there, someone would know and it would let them down. I remember a conversation with Coach Rosati about it early on in my high school days about how by being a part of the football team, you take on a role model status for all of those little kids who play lions club through middle school football.
The thought of letting down people who look up to you was and still is something I could/can never get over. I guess the reason I thought of all this is because of the unusual situation on Saturday night where I was at a party with mostly juniors in high school - a couple of which were worth seeing. One of whom was talking about looking up to guys like myself and the other guys in my grade...hearing things like that make you realize that whether or not you were thinking about it - those guys were watching. Further proof and further bolstering of my beliefs and practices.
Iduno, I just felt like motivating a little bit...deep down, someone's always watching
watching, judging, smiling, hi honey, look at the baby, look at the baby.
Seriously though, there's always someone who knows, and sometimes the littlest things stick with people. Tiny snippets that seem insignificant to you can make all the difference in the world to someone else.

A motivational quote that fits nicely right here, courtesy of Lou Cirino: "Never, if possible, lie down at night without being able to say: I made one human being, at least a little wiser, a little happier, or a little better this day."


That's all I have right now, I promise next time will be funnier.
Adieu.

Unrelated thoughts

I'm gonna go in a few different directions here...first of all, there was a meeting in the lobby today. The banner read FREE SEX Information. ...I thought that was pretty clever. Anyway, at the meeting, they passed out green condoms and some condom education sheets. Some things that I think are worth mentioning about this are as follows: What kind of girl would be willing to have sex with a man who put on a green condom? Seriously, why don't they pass out a condom that you could use on people that aren't blind (cuz how many blind hotties have you ever met? Just out of curiosity, is all)?
The other thing that should be noted about this seemingly good idea for a meeting is they gave out a sheet titled "13 steps for Using a Condom Correctly" Step 1. Get consent.
Get consent for what? Are you about to have sex with a girl and then have to ask if you can use a condom? If she says no, do you not have sex? What is going on here? This is just about the strangest thing I've ever read.

Let's get to more interesting stuff.
Cavaliers opened, won, outplayed the Wizards. Larry Hughes is very good at basketball again, that's nice. LeBron James is still real good, although he didn't do anything that absolutely blew me away (save having 2 very nice blocks). Any way you slice it, Cavs won, 1 down, 81 Ws to go. Got the Spurs Friday night in what'll surely be a barn-burner.
Browns finally got a W on the same day that the Bengals and Steelers lost. For those 5 hours or so, all was right in the world. Then you look at the stat sheet and realize that we still were held under 300 yards of offense and you realize that Jeff Davidson had very little to do with that win, and that the defense really just rocked the Jets' socks off. That's not to say that Davidson didn't commit to the run, as advertised. Droughns did end up with 33 carries for 125 yards, which was pretty sweet. Iduno, I'm not holding out a ton of hope for this week, but as a Cleveland fan, I'm eternally optimistic.


More other news, Halloween at OU really is pretty wild. This year was a supposedly small crowd, which is really something considering that there were an ass-load of people in town. Iduno, lots of people, lots of fun, good times, I'm going to bed so I can actually get a decent night's sleep before I drive home tomorrow.
Keep on keepin' on, Cleveland sports fans, I dig ya.



that would be my sign off if I were a Cleveland sports personality.